About me
Well, let's see. I'm older than I look because of the advent of Youtube makeup tutorials, fatter than in person, thanks to spanks and body magic, which does wonders, and frankly, to be honest, I still haven’t figured out who I am. I'm OK with that. Are you?
I do have some level of education, but it’s not worth the ink on the paper to mention it, lets face it, I’m either underemployed or unemployed, so yes I’m banking on your income to take care of me.
My Life and Ambitions
I’m just trying to keep my head above water. People tell me I look like Bey or Riahana, so I’m thinking about going into showbiz. Nope. Never taken any acting or modeling class. But these days, is all about that bass….and I’ve got plenty of that.
A Brief History of my life
I grew up in the hood, raised by a single mother, I have about 5 siblings, and I may, just may be as the psychiatrist told me “a broken girl with daddy issues”, so be prepared for a roller-coaster relationship. I will be highly emotional, accusatory, unpredictable, and when I’m wrong, play the victim roll.
My Perfect First Date
Pick me up late in your Chevy on twenty fours, have the blunt already rolled, take me to Hooters, pay the tab, stop at the liquor store to pick up ciroc, and then take me back to your mothers basement. It would help if you showed up wearing timberland boots, skinny jeans (heard that’s the style now) a snap back hat, and of course the too long double xl white T.
The things I could never live without
My knock-off Michael Kors purse, leggings, jeggins, the satin night cap I wear outside, 24 inch weave, and I don’t discriminate nationalities, it could be from India, Malaysia, or Brazil.
Favorite books, TV shows, movies
I mean are you for real?, the last book I held was the one I had to put my hand on and swear to tell the truth. Not a good question for this point in the hunt. My favorite movies are Scandal, Empire, and Greys Anatomy. But I do watch roots every year during Black History month.
For Fun I like to
Do whatever you like to do, because on the serious tip, I’m tired of being alone, so if you wanna club all night….on a Tuesday…then imma be in there wit you
On Friday and Saturday nights I typically
Turn up!
I'm Looking For
A man to take care of me, my kids, and maybe even my momma. Somebody whos thirsty for the hustle, who won’t mind letting me count his money.
My ideal relationship
• someone’s who smart, funny, kind
• knows how to hold a convo
• who got his ish together
• ain’t got no crazy baby mommas
• he gotta have two jobs, 1 for each set of his kids
• he gotta be cut, I mean he gotta look good wearing that wife beater
•
My past relationships
(Not counting my last baby daddy? was just peachy.)
Train wreck, slacker, unavailable hunk, egomaniacal sadistic prick, narcissist. Like I said, it can only go up from there. But I tend not to focus on the past, I'm all about living in the moment
You should definitely message me if
You coming correct, don’t be on here disrespecting me
YOLO! Tiff Tiff the thick one, hit me on the gram, or at me @Tiffthethickone my nigs
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